Friday, April 30, 2010

The Adventures of Shannon's CPs (Part Two)

Still in the dark--*waves from the shadows*--but once again I have not abandoned you. My other CP (part of the pair I collectively call 'The Sara(h)s') has provided an awesome guest post--still heavy on the Shannon Shame, but definitely justifying why she is "The Sweet One."

(Yeah Sara minus the 'h'--I'm calling you 'The Evil One' now--thanks to your dare of doom.)
#don'targue
#youknowit'strue

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The Adventures of Shannon’s CPs: Part Deux

When Shannon asked me to guest blog for her, my first thought was, “Dude! This is going to be just like Home Alone!” Okay, maybe it’s more like Blog Alone.

*jumps on the bed  previous posts* *slides down the stairs sidebar*

Crap. Did you hear that? Um, maybe now is a good time to pretend to not be a nine-year old genius home alone at Christmas to be blogging about something significant.

FIVE WAYS YOU KNOW YOU’RE SHANNON’S CP:

1.     #1) Hashtags are the basis of your friendship (okay, hashtags and Idol)
Before there was Gmail or e-mail (or pen and paper, really), there was Twitter. And there was me and Shannon, DMing back and forth for hours. Her first night at The Conference, Shannon sent me the following DM: OMG. So many people. Don’t know anyone. SEND DEPP. Okay, that might have said “Send HELP.” Hmm, yes. Yes, I see, in retrospect, that “help” was most likely what it said.
I spent the next hour DMing back helpful things like this: #breathe #foodisbetterinyourstomach, notonfloor #imagineallagentsareTwizzlers

Well, I might not have been quite that helpful. But still, thank goodness we’ve since discovered Gmail they’ve since invented Gmail. It’s much more convenient.

2.     #2) You’re a 20 year old cougar
So. There’s this boy in Shannon’s novel. Shannon’s middle-grade novel. He is, like, 14. I am, like, not-14. That is as much as I wish to say on the matter. 
(Shannon interrupts to say, don't worry Sarah--it's happened to everyone so far, and they're all older than you. The boy's got skills) :)

3.     #3) You need to remind her to eat
Sara mentioned this in her post Wednesday, but it’s a well-known fact. Shannon does not remember to eat.  Like, ever. It’s like in one of those movies and TV shows where characters never need to eat or sleep or use the bathroom. Not to mention any names (cough 24 cough). Which brings me to my next theory: Shannon is a vampire. Further theories and speculation welcome in the Comments section.

4.     #4) You spend inordinate amounts of time Youtubing terms like “unagi” and “Ross’s leather pants”
If you’re a Friends fan, you’re familiar with both terms. If not, let’s rectify that right now.
Honestly, left to my own devices, I’d be working to resolve the global climate change crisis, or kicking back with a quantum physics equation, as, you know, one does. Or perhaps writing some moving poetry in memory of NSync:
Who could have guessed? Who could have seen? We never got the chance to say Bye Bye Bye.
Er, where was I?
Right. Irreverent Youtube clips are a total time suck. Except…they’re pretty funny. And sometimes, they’re the only way to coax Shannon away from writing/revising/Twitter (she’s a teeny bit addicted) for a little while.

5.     #5) You can’t stop reading
Here’s how you know for sure you’re Shannon’s critique partner. You’re up reading past your bedtime. Um, don’t mock. Self-enforced bedtimes are all the rage these days. You never finished that Pulitzer-worthy NSync poem. You forgot to eat. You haven’t been on Twitter all day. And you’re swooning over 14 year old boys.
You can’t stop reading.

That’s how you know for sure you’re Shannon’s CP. Okay, if you’re receiving hashtags in emails (#hashtagsinemails), that’s a pretty good sign, too.

But whether you’re repenting for your cougarish ways, Youtubing, or engaging in full-length conversations over Twitter (hey, e-mail was not invented back then), it’s always fun!

Thanks for having me over, Shannon! And, um, guys, can we keep the jumping on the bed previous posts thing just between us?

*     *     *

*Dabs eyes*
*Sniffles*

See? Do you SEE why she's "The Sweet One"? 

*Sniffles More*

Thank you so much to both of my CPs for covering for me this week and to my loyal awesome followers who've been so patient with my revision schedule. I should be back to a normal blogging schedule next week--though you may still find me hard to reach. Frankly, I need a vacation. So I'm planning to stay unplugged from everything except blogging for just a little bit longer, so I can...yanno...maybe sleep? Eat? *Gasp* See my husband? 

Happy Friday Everyone!

(And hey--why are my previous posts all messy? Has SOMEONE been jumping on them?)
:)

Wednesday, April 28, 2010

The Adventures of Shannon's CPs (Part One)

So...I'm still in the dark (because OMG my deadline is right on top of me) but I didn't want to abandon my blog for another entire week. So I begged my CPs--who I collectively call "The Sara(h)s" to each do a guest post to help me out.

And.
They.
Ganged.
Up.
On.
Me.
(I KNEW I shouldn't have given them each other's email addresses)

They agreed, only on the condition that the posts would feature their trials/tribulations/adventures as my CPs (which is, of course, HEAVY on the Shannon Shame) and I had to post whatever they wrote--no matter what. No changing a word. 

Um....yeah.

So what you are about to witness folks is an act of sheer desperation. The fact that I've agreed to post this should show you just how hectic my life is right now--AND how much I love you guys and don't want to neglect you. Because it is madness I tell you. SHEER MADNESS.

Today's Guest Post is by Sara minus the 'h' who will henceforth be known as The Evil Genius:

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CP Adventures?

Heh. More like CP secrets REVEALED!

Dun Dun Dunnnnn

When I found out Sarah and I were both guest posting this week—and that we had permission to write about the Adventures of Being Shannon’s CPs—I was stoked! There were so many fun directions I could have taken this, but one thing was certain: Shannon Shame was gonna be served in heaping helpings! (oops, sorry Shannon—that’s what happens when you give me free rein…)

So, I thought I’d give this a whirl acrostic poem style!



is for the Silly outfits I get to hear about! The other week she was revising in stretch pants and her husband’s He-Man T-shirt. (Bet she’s wishing she hadn’t shared that with me, hehe)



is for Happy Meals! Because, sometimes Shannon needs reminders to eat. Seriously—I even yelled at her the other day until her husband got on IM to tell me he was heading out to get her a Happy Meal!



is for ANOTHER version of *this* chapter. For instance, I have approximately four emails in my “Shannon” folder with subjects reading “Use THIS version of chapter 13”.  (Okay fine. I do the SAME thing. So perhaps we’re soul CPs…)





is for Nightmares. Because as Shannon’s CP, I have them. Holy mama jama, you should SEE some of the things she researches for her book. For instance, what am I supposed to do when she warns me never to look up Camel Spiders? Clearly, google them, right? WRONG. But what would YOU do if I say—don’t click this link! It will show you what a camel spider is and they are SCARY? Yep, you clicked it—or at least wanted to, didn’t you?



is for NICKNAMES that Shannon comes up with. Like the one she has for her PJs.



is for the “Oh Noes” Shannon’s about to be saying. You know, like right now when I dare her to create a vlog to reveal the PJ nickname I mentioned above AND sing the special song she sings when putting them on every night! Oh, and all while wearing her stretch pants and her husband’s He-Man T-shirt!!! (Dear Shannon, I know you quit the other blog wars because you were so immersed in this round of revisions, so I understand! But this dare is for when you’ve FINISHED this round of revisions. And I’m not really starting a blog war with you, because: )



is for No dare-backs. That’s right. I did it. I just dared Shannon to do something on HER OWN BLOG. And declared no dare-backs at the same time. #SaraisanEvilGenius




*     *     *

O
M
G
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
This is what I get for asking for help???????????????
Vlogs?
Pajama Nicknames?
ARE YOU KIDDING ME???????????????????????????????

*deep breath*

FINE
I'll do it!
When my revisions are COMPLETELY DONE--not just this round!
*stalls to search for a better loophole*
*prepares to need COPIOUS amounts of alcohol*

And...um...in the meantime, if your name is Sara(h) and you'd like to try being my CP let me know, cause um...THERE'S AN OPENING NOW!!!!

*runs and hides*
*plans revenge*